Welcome aboard, everyone!
My name is Melanie and I’m just another person who’s roaming this earth, attempting this amazing thing called life. Today is my 24th birthday! Woohoo!
My parents were SO convinced I was going to be a boy that they didn’t even have a girls name picked out for me. (I can honestly say that was the first of MANY surprises I have given my parents in life). Due to my parents only having the name “Andrew” in mind, it has officially been 24 years to the day in which my Nana came to the rescue and chose my name. In return, my parents decided I would hold her name, “Catherine”, as my middle name. Today is not only my 24th birthday, but it also the one year anniversary of my grandmothers passing.
I was born on June 17th, 1993 at 3:45 a.m. and my grandmother passed away on June 17th, 2016 at 3:45 a.m.
It had always been important to me to have my grandmother’s approval and make her proud…due to that and tough love, I know that’s why she and I did not see eye-to-eye often. I often felt I was a disappointment to her and consistently failing in her eyes.
But now that I look back with a different perspective, I realize that she was actually one of the VERY few people who supported and believed in me when I enlisted in the Marine Corps. (I will never forget the last things she said to me before I shipped to boot camp). I now also see that I really hadn’t done anything yet to deserve her approval and to make her proud. What do you do – give your grandkid a pat on the back when she gets through something traumatic or makes progress? No. That’s not how life works and that’s not going to help your grandkid grow. That’s not how you toughen someone up for what’s to come in the world. You need to always be told you can continue to better yourself.
Catherine Pearson was right. I was capable of more. I was capable of becoming a better person and she knew that. No, that doesn’t mean I was in a bad place or doing bad things or not making progress, but she wanted the best for me because that’s the kind of love you get from an amazing loving grandmother, and I wasn’t there.
I’m so grateful that the steps I had been taking all those years weren’t enough for her…because it wasn’t enough. Yeah, steps are extremely valuable and important, but each step is NOT enough and that’s why they’re called steps. If one, two, or even five steps were enough, we’d all be content and happy with mediocre. We’d all be living half fulfilled lives and never getting close to the moon.
I want to say the biggest, most heartfelt thanks to my grandmother for always keeping me motivated through tough love, which I know is only given to people you love endlessly…for giving me the best mother anyone could have ever asked for, and for showing me that it’s possible to be one bad ass chick who can have it all. (Her life was pretty amazing if I do say so myself).
So this leads me here to all of you.
Through these 24 years, I have been given many names since my first name…sister, cousin, auntie, friend, best friend, photographer, Catholic, sailor, second baseman, left field, the girl with anxiety, another Boyajian, traveler, Flight Attendant…and I can assure you the list goes on.
That’s a newer one. We’re going on two years now, so I guess you could say things are pretty serious between us 😉
That is not only the name that changed my life for the better, but that is the name that has changed ME for the better.
Even though I don’t think my story is better than anyone else’s I am very aware that I have gone through things in life that you’re not raised and taught how to handle…things they don’t have books on to show you how to get you through when they’re happening – such as growing up with severe anxiety in a time doctors barely knew what that word was, (let alone how to help you with it), or having your best friend die when you were 18. Then another friend die…then another…and then another 24 hours later. Experiencing and then trying to recover from abusive relationships, or packing up and moving across the country all alone with one bag, to name a few.
There were a lot of times in life I wish I had help from someone who understood, so I hope that if I share my story, maybe it can help someone – somewhere, someday. If this ever helps even one person suffering from a panic attack one day, or help one person who can’t get out of bed and feels like their heart died over someone’s death, it’ll be worth sharing my story to the world.
I am in no means a professional but if you follow me, I will follow you. I will always be an ear for you. I want to continue to grow and improve and I want to do that with you all. Let’s all walk down Flying Ave, Faith Ave, and Feelings Ave together.
This story is going to jump around a bit…and will be including videos as well. I would to share my story and all these things in my mind through blog posts. I would also like to share vlogs of my life as a Flight Attendant and post other videos on how to help those looking for information on how to enter, (and survive), this crazy lifestyle we have as airline crew members.
As I share my story and bounce between different topics, I ask you to bear with me. What’s the fun in a boring straight line anyways? Star Wars taught us that 🙂
Hope you join me for the ride. Please fasten your seat belt as we’ll be expecting some turbulence along the way.
We’ll be cruising at 40 thousand feet.